Friday, January 6, 2012

split personality

the clothes we wear represent us. when we put things on, if they "feel like" us, we're comfortable. if they don't "feel like" us, we feel awkward. never mind if the actual garments are comfortable or not. what we wear, to a large degree, shows the people around us who we are.

i think that cars are largely the same way. people drive cars that feel like them. we all have preconceived ideas about what kind of person drives a certain kind of car.

we own a mini van, semi-affectionately known as vanny, that's  15 years old. it's a box on wheels with a broken side door handle and lots of dirt. i don't love vanny, but i'm grateful for her transportation even though she shrieks loudly whenever she's running and vibrates quite noticeably when we get above 45 mph.

i don't feel like vanny fits me. i'm slightly embarrassed by her, though i try really hard not to be. she makes me feel poor and vaguely trashy. like i should be handing out generic soda's and happy meals while yelling and back-handing a van full of dirty, snotty, whining children who are wearing too short pants and no seat belts.

sometimes i drive my mother in law's car for small errands close to home. she has a lincoln town car. it drives very nicely and i surely appreciate the chance to be able to go to the library or grocery store when chris is at work, but i feel awkward when i drive it. like i'm a little old lady, surrounded by 8 feet of nose and 6 feet of tail, driving at a sedate pace with the radio off and never letting anyone get in front of me in traffic. i feel like i should drive slowly in the fast lane and perhaps don a rain bonnet to keep my perm tidy in case of rain. when's the last time you saw anyone who couldn't qualify for a senior citizen's discount driving one of these babies?

this week we've been staying at my sister and her fiancee's house while they're traveling so that we can take care of their two big dogs. they left my almost-brother-in-law's lovely mustang here with the key in case i needed to go somewhere. brooke and i took it out to a playdate a couple days ago and it was rather amusing to me to drive it. it's very loud and roars when you give it even a little gas and the bass is cranked up so high, there's no way the cars around us can't hear us booming when we're at a traffic light. generally i don't see a lot of women driving muscle cars, so i'm not quite sure what stereotype i should fit into here. i googled "girls who drive mustangs" and i got a bunch of mini-skirted, bikini clad, darkly tanned young hot bods. none of them were short, chubby moms with a tweenaged daughter peeking out the back window, giggling about her mom driving a sports car.


i feel like i've got a split vehicular personality these days and none of them fit me. i look forward to the day when i can once again drive a car that represents me as me, and not just the wheels i'm able to get my hands on. i think if i could pick any car at all, i'd probably go with something like this.

14 comments:

  1. I think I can understand exactly where you're coming from here but saying that Vanny seems reliable and lovable so I don't know. All I've ever had to drive is my dad's Renault family car so maybe one day I'll feel the same rush and different personality you do too! Great post anyway as usual.

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  2. oh... I wish I could buy you a car!

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  3. An interesting approach to people and their cars!

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  4. Your pick is a Dodge Magnum, a very cool and sought after car for most Dodge fans. Sadly they no longer manufacture it so it is hard to get. If you guys are ever in the position or need to get a car my hubs works for Hendrick Dodge which is the only reason I get to drive this baby.

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  5. I guess I can not paste a photo but I am blessed to be able to drive a 2010 Dodge Challenger and I love it. Of course, my main vehicle is an SUV and I only get the "cool" car one or two days a week, if I'm lucky but on those days, watch out. :)

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  6. I drive a Malibu... unfortunately, 6 months ago, someone hit me in my right fender. It has YET to be fixed. *sigh* I constantly make right turns so no one sees the yucky side.

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  7. Ah yes that is a car I can totally see you driving. Sassy.

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  8. Quite honestly I would drive anything that moves and manages to keep it's oil on the inside.

    My Vauxhall Astra is a wreck that is waiting for it's final date with the scrapyard.

    I've driven BMW 7's, Merc 500 SL's, 18 Wheelers of various makes and a huge number of vehicles in between, but I have still to find a car that matches the looks and personality of a slightly overweight, bespectacled and balding guy like myself.

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  9. My van of choice is always the MPV.....the older models...we have had 3 and the last one, which is a sad, stupid, angry story of how we do not have it now. anyhow we affectionatly nick named it the "stink eye" because my son smashed the left front into the snow bank. it pushed up the fron light a little and now it looks like it is winking at you.

    anyhow I see it around town and I want my Stink eye back so bad.

    now I drive my hubbies 1996 volkswagon golf. and I hate it. because I am used to shoving all my finds in the back of the van, and it is a two door which makes me insane.

    it is hard for me to get in and out of too, and driving stick with my bad arm sucks.

    about the clothes? I don't dress anything like I would if I was 150 pounds........sigh.

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  10. I think we all have our dream car. I used to have a wonderful Subaru Forrester before I moved here. Dang I miss that car.
    Now I drive an old Nissan........that's just kinda hanging on, with a broken windshield due to all our gravel roads.

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  11. We had to drive a Lincoln town car last year. We had to rent a car while our Avenger was getting fixed and that was the only car they had available. Kiddo said it smelled like old people.

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  12. I am quite often behind the wheel of a 1986 F-350 dually with a flatbed. It's missing some paint, has holes and cracks in the dash, and the speedometer no longer works. I have to sit on a doubled-over pillow in order to see over the steering wheel, and I have to bounce a time or two in order to get up in the driver's seat. Occasionally, there is a big horse trailer hitched up behind me. Everyone recognizes me because there's not another truck like it within 100 miles. Most women would be ashamed to be seen in such a contraption, but it doesn't bother me a bit. Did I mention that it's a diesel? Nothing screams "sexy" louder than a woman who smells like diesel fuel!

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  13. I feel like my truck. Even though I'm not black, I have trouble moving on frosty mornings, I leak, and I have a little rust on my right rear.

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  14. damn...I don't know what kind of vehicle suits me. I've been driving my little green Ford Contour for YEARS now. I guess IT suits me. It's not a family wagon, or even all that nice, and now she has a dent in the driver door thanks to some ass one snowy morning after dropping the kids off at school. Yeah, I guess that's my kind of car, except maybe a little newer, with a cd player that FREAKING WORKS, and the intermittent wipers setting isn't broken, and the window defroster NEVER lets me down.

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don't let me be the only one doing the talking around here. spill your guts!