why do i feel compelled to over-explain things to brooke? sometimes i hear myself telling her things when she never even asked a question on the topic, just because i feel like she needs to know things.
she's watching an animal planet show about cheetahs and, of course, there's mating. almost every nature show about animals shows mating and so often, there's violence involved. either the males try to kill each other for mating rights or cubs are killed to bring the female into heat so he can mate with her. there's often biting and aggression inflicted on the poor girl by her determined suitor.
we just found ourselves watching a part where the female was clearly not enjoying her experience. the male was chomping on her neck and she was snarling and trying to bite him back. finally he released her and she skulked away, showing her fangs.
next thing i know, i'm saying to brooke, "when humans mate, it's not like that. i mean, the girl isn't hurt during the process. and there shouldn't be biting. i mean, unless she likes biting, but then it wouldn't be to draw blood, just to.... well, um...."
then i tried to stop and think for a moment before going on with my horrible speech.
"well, sometimes it IS like that and a girl gets hurt and she's mad about it, but that's called rape. and rape is bad. rape is when a man decides he going to mate with a woman whether she likes it or not and while that might be okay in the animal kingdom, that's not okay with humans. and if it ever happens, the police must be told and the man needs to go to jail. and he should probably have his wiener chopped off."
mental hesitation. i clearly didn't pause long enough to think at my last break. why am i explaining rape to a nine year old innocent?
"but mostly with humans, the mating part should be nice. and last longer than thirty seconds. and the partners should love each other and stay together afterwards. and the girl shouldn't be mad at the end. and the male shouldn't kill her babies."
i'm such an awkward human sometimes.
she's watching an animal planet show about cheetahs and, of course, there's mating. almost every nature show about animals shows mating and so often, there's violence involved. either the males try to kill each other for mating rights or cubs are killed to bring the female into heat so he can mate with her. there's often biting and aggression inflicted on the poor girl by her determined suitor.
we just found ourselves watching a part where the female was clearly not enjoying her experience. the male was chomping on her neck and she was snarling and trying to bite him back. finally he released her and she skulked away, showing her fangs.
next thing i know, i'm saying to brooke, "when humans mate, it's not like that. i mean, the girl isn't hurt during the process. and there shouldn't be biting. i mean, unless she likes biting, but then it wouldn't be to draw blood, just to.... well, um...."
 |
| it shouldn't be like this. |
then i tried to stop and think for a moment before going on with my horrible speech.
"well, sometimes it IS like that and a girl gets hurt and she's mad about it, but that's called rape. and rape is bad. rape is when a man decides he going to mate with a woman whether she likes it or not and while that might be okay in the animal kingdom, that's not okay with humans. and if it ever happens, the police must be told and the man needs to go to jail. and he should probably have his wiener chopped off."
mental hesitation. i clearly didn't pause long enough to think at my last break. why am i explaining rape to a nine year old innocent?
"but mostly with humans, the mating part should be nice. and last longer than thirty seconds. and the partners should love each other and stay together afterwards. and the girl shouldn't be mad at the end. and the male shouldn't kill her babies."
 |
| it should be more like this. |
i'm such an awkward human sometimes.
haha awesome (This is your sister Sarah btw, it won't let me comment as anything else)
ReplyDeletewelcome, my pretty. (did you hear that in a wizard of oz witchy voice? cuz that's the voice i typed it in.)
Deleteoh my......what was her response..you sure gave her a lot to think on..humans biting? hahahaa...If I was a kid boy that would make me wonder. You are too funny.
ReplyDeleteA nine year old should at least know that there is unwanted mating.......and clarifying it was a good move.....maybe she would think it was alright...who knows?
i agree that eventually a kid needs to know that unwanted mating occurs. i'm just not sure i went about explaining it right.
DeleteThis really made me laugh Sherry. Despite everything I think you did a good job with this, it might have been awkward but you did great.
ReplyDeletethank you.
DeleteGreat post. This reminds me of a cartoon I once saw. Two male cheetahs are looking off into the distance where a female cheetah is enjoying the shade under a tree. One of the male cheetah's turns to the other and says, "At zero to sixty miles an hour in less than six seconds she can just stay a virgin!" Hope you're having a great week.
ReplyDeletethose silly male cheetahs. not willing to work for it.
DeleteLOL. We do tend to over-explain sometimes, and then we are deep into it and don't know how to exit gracefully!
ReplyDeletei'm very good at getting into such topics and then wondering how to gracefully extricate myself before i do any further damage.
Deletehow come I imagine Brooke just sitting there silently, taking it ALLLLLLL IN...
ReplyDeleteAh, we do overcompensate for life's ugliness, don't we.
you're right. she didn't say a word. silent absorption and then she looked away.
DeleteVery funny! Especially that bit about lasting longer than thirty seconds!
ReplyDeletei tried to give her the straight story.
DeleteStraight? My goodness! There's no such thing as a 'straight one'!
DeleteI think the female was pissed because it's well known the cheetah is the fastest animal on the planet (well, besides cats and dogs in front of Chinese restaurants).
ReplyDeleteNow...Cheetos mating...that would probably be boring.
this was extremely funny and clever! l-o-v-e :-)
ReplyDeleteWell, at least you try to be honest. I would cowardly lie probably! They don't recommend that, do they?
ReplyDeleteAlthough I'm laughing my butt off, I think you need to step away from the nature channel!
ReplyDeleteIt's supposed to be longer than 30 seconds?
ReplyDeleteLike. I can so relate.
ReplyDeleteNot to mention that our Aspie kids take in EVERYTHING..
ReplyDeletethey never forget..lol
Oh, how awkward! The last thing you want is for Brooke to think that is what sex is supposed to be like. if you don't address it, how will you know what she's thinking? Remind me to block Animal Planet... (So glad you came by my blog. I really like yours, too!)
ReplyDeleteI think everything posted made a bunch of sense.
ReplyDeleteBut, what about this? what if you added a little information?
I am not saying your information is not solid.
, but what if you added a title that grabbed people's attention? I mean "the mating game" is kinda boring. You might peek at Yahoo's front page and
see how they create article headlines to grab people to open the links.
You might try adding a video or a picture or two to grab people interested about what you've written. Just my opinion, it would bring your posts a little bit more interesting.
Check out my site : Orlando fl hookah bar