Friday, January 28, 2011

shut it, kid

today has been one of those days on the homefront where i shake my head & wonder why it's too late to go back & use some birth control. because my kid is straight up driving me NUTS! the chaos & crying that periodically take over my wee one are enough to make me want to take up smoking & drinking all over again. and perhaps indulgence in some smokable organic substances that shall remain nameless. i haven't used them before, but today seems like it might be the day to start.

we recently studied an indian tribe and we learned that when their babies were born, any time they cried, the parents would pinch the baby's mouth and nose shut so that it couldn't breathe. when it stopped crying, it was allowed to breathe again. their lifestyle of hiding and hunting depended on stealthiness. they didn't leave the kids with granny while they went on their stealthy missions, so the kids had to learn to hold back any and all sounds, even if they got hurt. otherwise, the whole tribe could go hungry or get scalped due to some kid stepping on a thorn with his little bare foot and letting out a yelp or a howl.


this is sounding like a very good idea to me today. do you think it's too late for me to do that to brooke?

29 comments:

  1. Aw man. Sorry you are stressed. That's actually interesting about the Indians. Maybe they were smoking some nameless organic substances to make them do that. ;) My dad just finished reading a biography of Thomas "Stonewall" Jackson who would refuse to pick up his 4 month old daughter until she STOPPED crying. It didn't take long for her to learn and she never cried around him. I'm just not that disciplined or hard-core. :)

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  2. motherly suffering aside, that was a very interesting story! I also feel like making a pie with crust just like that...it would be soooo satisfying.

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  3. I'd like to kmow more about that Indian mouth pinching technique that could certainly be useful round these parts.

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  4. here's a source (not the one we were reading) that tells about the babies being pinched shut to prevent crying. in the section on children.
    http://www.kawvalley.k12.ks.us/schools/rjh/marneyg/archived_projects/2001_plains_projects/01_SiouxIndians_AricaS.htm

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  5. Haha! I feel your pain! It sounds ruthless yet fascinating. How I would enjoy the quiet if I could manage something like that around here.

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  6. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day, if not, perhaps you could threaten to put her on ebay... I know that is what my fiance threatens to do with me at least once a week when I get on his nerves. Shuts me up instantly!

    Hope for a better weekend for you Sherlipooh!

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  7. I love that picture. Made my day seeing that.

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  8. When mine gets to acting like that, Honeyman just looks at me and asks if I am sure I don't want another 3 or 4.
    When I was growing up, I always got the" quit your crying or I'll give you something to cry about". Effective tool, but I wouldn't ever do that.
    Honeyman has used it once in a while and I cringe every time I hear it.

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  9. On days like that, I just eat a lot.

    Hope it's better tomorrow!

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  10. Wow, I understand the reasoning behing that. Survival is, I guess, important:-) But that just seems crazy. Poor babies!

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  12. We all have bad days and 'badder' days, usually followed by days that aren't as bad as 'badder', but are certainly badder than 'bad'.

    It is the dream of everyone to wake up and have a good, or even gooder, day.

    Hopefully you will have a bad-less day very soon.

    What, er, was your point gain?

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  13. I can't stop looking at that pie...
    I know exactly what you mean. My son has days like this to.

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  14. That's terrible. (the mouth and nose pinching) I suppose it was necessary to survival, but it seems so cruel!

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  15. Oh tell me about it I have 4 kids and one of them who has turned out to be a very wonderful human being, who between the the ages of 12-16 I wanted her gone...out of the house..send her away...who would have thought pinching her nose and mouth during this time really would work?

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  16. you guys won't call social services on me if you see me sitting on her in proper eyedrop position, but instead of eye drops, i'm pinching her mouth & nose shut, will you? i promise i'll let go as soon as she shuts the heck up!

    (i really don't do this, but a mom can dream.)

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  17. Oh what a tempting solution to use on my own kids. Unfortunately, I don't think I could actually go through with it. (Although I'm sure my kids are glad! lol) Too bad there wasn't some magic trick and/or spell that would work on every kid to give us parents some peace and quiet! Hope things settle down soon for you. It can wear you down in a hurry.

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  18. sorry for the stressful day... Love the pie!

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  19. Love the pie! Hope today is a better day for you.

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  20. Oh I love the pinching of the nose and mouth when they cry! I'm trying that on my 15 year old tomorrow. It's that or he has to find a new home. I'm ready to punt him...had the same kind of day...is it a full moon?

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  21. I shudder as I remember those days. Never mind you haven't got to the bit yet when they come in at all hours of the day and night, play horrendous music or vomit a barrel of beer up on your new carpet...you'll ache for the crying days :-)
    Hope that's cheered you up.
    Many thanks for your great comment on my blog...loved the idea of girls in a peep show carrying brooms and umbrellas.
    Hope the crying stops soon...my mother used to give me a drop of whiskey to shut me up...no further comment. (hic!)
    Carol

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  22. oh, I can relate to this feeling. I have never heard that that story. I think it might not work now! :P

    Kelsey had a bad emotional melt down day of depression. It was awful. My heart was just a mess, as I just don't know how to make her feel normal. :(

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  23. Feeling your pain. Hate those days! Hope it improves soon xx

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  24. Even when stressed...you crack me up! I am with you this weekend, I need spring to come so the little people can be outside and burn their energy. Ugh. So I say,....whatever works!

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  25. Even when stressed...you crack me up! I am with you this weekend, I need spring to come so the little people can be outside and burn their energy. Ugh. So I say,....whatever works!

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  26. Hmmm- I may have to invest in your curriculum.

    I wonder if that method works for spouses?

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  27. I have utmost respect for anyone who takes up parenting. Loved the pie-crust! Good luck with the 'eternal motherly tolerance' thing. Must be good for the soul or something.

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  28. That IS very interesting, I wish I could stop all the crying at Target when I go (like every damn day!) haha, I gave you a super duper fun award today on my blog, come check it out when you have time :)

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don't let me be the only one doing the talking around here. spill your guts!